Here in designerland, we see a lot of “homemade” advertisements, flyers, direct mail and logos that absolutely make us cringe. Some are so terrible they nearly cause physical pain. We hear it over and over: “I just whipped it up myself in Microsoft Publisher!” or “My cousin is really artsy, so he did our logo!” You’re not fooling anybody, folks. One of the telltale signs of unprofessional and poor design is a certain set of hideous fonts, or typefaces, that seem to saturate our culture.

Here are 10 of the worst, most overused typefaces that you should stop using immediately. There are similar lists out there on the World Wide Web, but in the interest of the greater good, these things bear repeating. And repeating. And repeating… until they are banished from existence.

10. Copperplate. Yes, I said it: Copperplate. The standard for law firms and dentist’s offices, Copperplate is a really boring font trying to fool you into thinking it’s professional, bold and refined. There are about 3,284 other typefaces out there that can do the same thing, but better. Find something unique!

9. Impact. A sure way to make a poor impact (badum-ching!) is to use this font. Sports teams, that means you too! It’s clunky, overly condensed, and really heavy. When I see it, I want to scream, “BACK OFF, MAN! What did I ever do to you?!”

8. Fonts that look like other things. I honestly would rather see clip art than these unsightly and illegitimate excuses for fonts. Good typefaces can certainly have “personality,” but they should never be a picture. Cut it out!

7. Mistral. Ouch, I just got poked in the eye! Oh, wait, that was just one of Mistral’s jagged strokes that got out of hand…. I’ve seen this font on everything from a scrapbooking flyer to a seafood restaurant menu, and each time it hurts my eyes. Too hard to read, too pointy, too over-the-top.

6. Brush Script. Much like Mistral, this typeface is hard to read, very overused and a little out of control. It’s often used to make something seem vintage or classic, but it’s neither. Move on, my friends.

5. Monotype Corsiva. Using this font will not make your business or event or invitation seem fancy, professional or high-class. It’s 100 percent cheesy. In its place, a simple serif font could work wonders, or a script font that’s not so recognizable or monotone.

4. Hobo. I think Hobo is supposed to appeal to teens, hippies, musicians, college students, clowns, children, and tree-huggers. In reality, it shouldn’t appeal to anyone with an ounce of visual taste. A lot of things should stay in the past never to return; this font is one of them.

3. Curlz. Do I seriously need to explain this one? A typeface should be used to convey a message, not an acid-fueled carnival.

2. Papyrus. You’ll see this font when someone wants to seem exotic, tropical, old world, mystical or all-natural. But what it’s really saying is, “We didn’t ask anyone if Papyrus was a good idea before we used it.” Rely on other design elements to give off the “we’re special and unique” feeling and go for a clean, simple typeface instead.

1. Comic Sans (aka the bane of my existence). If you’ve never heard of the hatred that Comic Sans conjures, you’re hanging out with the wrong crowd. As the name suggests, this typeface is appropriate in a comic strip…and nowhere else. Just because so many people use it, doesn’t mean you should too. It’s not “cute,” “fun,” or “perfect for kid stuff.” It can only be described as an abomination.

Now, some of you are sitting there thinking, “WHAT? If I can’t use any of these fonts, what’s left?” Get ahold of yourself, man! Just shoot us an e-mail. VANGEL can always take care of your design projects—but with better typefaces.